This is an old post when from when I was pregnant with our Zechariah. These were some trying days but with God's peace, joy, and strength I longed to meet our little baby and live a life with our son...even if he had problems physically and/or mentally....because I knew...in my heart he would be "perfect".
I dedicate this to my friend (you know who you are) who is struggling with the possibility of her young one having some problems.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and
supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." `~Philippians 4:6-7
11 weeks ago the Lord blessed AJ and I with a new child that is being
knit in my womb. The weeks and days have been long with the never
ending nausea, fatigue, and detest for most smells. This is a blessing
though because I am in constant reminder that the Lord is forming a
perfect child for our family.
The first question people
ask me is, " Do you want a boy or girl?" I usually respond "whatever
the Lord gives me I will be thankful". Then they proceed to say,"Well,
as long as it is healthy, that is what matters." Although they have good
intentions when they say this, the Lord placed on my heart last Wed.,
August 14th, WHAT IF THE BABY IS NOT HEALTHY?
So, What if the baby is not healthy?...
Does
this mean the baby will be less special? What about less beautiful or
handsome? A mess up by God? Not as lovable? A burden? Embarrassing?
God forbid!
I
believe God placed this on my heart because 2 days ago I went to the
dr. for a regular checkup. As Dr. Moore checked for a heartbeat he could
not find one. After checking vaginally and still not able to find a
heartbeat he ordered an ultrasound on me right then. He told me to be
praying ( he is a fine christian). When I went into the room with
Elijah, my youngest who is almost 18 months,
They found a
heartbeat. Dr. Moore and I gave thanks to God. As he was leaving the
room, the ultrasound lady tapped him on the leg and pointed to the
screen. They looked for a bit, meanwhile Elijah is tired, hungry,
teething, and sick which leads to a fussy baby. After a few minutes of
them looking, Dr. Moore said they are looking at the head of the baby as
it looks like it is swelling. They proceeded to look and discuss things
with each other for about 15 min. I did not hear anything they said due
to Elijah fussing. Dr. Moore said they want to do an U/S on me in 4
weeks to check the baby. To be praying. He said it could be nothing, but
then again it could be something.
So here I am now 2 days later.
What
does all of this mean? Well, after some research, it could mean
different things. I won't go into detail but each one is not favorable
to a "healthy" baby.
So again, what does all of this mean?
It
means God is still in control. God is forming this wee one in my womb.
Is this baby perfect? Spiritually, no, no one is perfect, but
physically, yes, my "Little One" is perfect because God is forming the
baby perfect in HIS sight. The world would say," Oh how terrible, what a
sad thing", I say, MY GOD IS GOOD.
In God's Word He
says in Romans 8:28 "And we know all things work together for good to
them that love God, to them that are called according to His purpose."
So,
IF this baby is not perfect in the worlds eyes, I will not lose hope in
my God and what He has preordained for AJ and I. We will rejoice in
knowing that God is doing a good work in us. He is molding us according
to HIS purpose in HIS way.
I am not foolish enough to
know there will not be hard times emotionally. I will shed tears...I
have already. I may grow weary at times. I may find it hard to smile at
times thinking of my "Little One" who may suffer...
But
I will keep my eyes on Christ. I will look to Him for my peace,
comfort, and joy. And I will rejoice in the Lord, whatever the outcome
of the next ultrasound, for I know.......our baby is being knitted by
God's PERFECT hands and will be PERFECT according to Him.
Thank you God for our "Little One".
I Love you friend, please know we are praying for you in this time of uncertainty! Cast your care upon Christ...for He careth for you...and your little one!
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Shatterred Dreams
Last week, My good and dear friend, Amy, texted me.
"Please pray for Rob! We're on our way to the hospital in an ambulance. He dove into the pool down the street and didn't come up. He's not real alert, not breathing well, and seems to have some spinal and neck issues!!!"
All day waiting, 5 hours of surgery, my dear friend learned her husband was paralyzed, chest down with no use of arms and legs.
"Complete paralysis" the dr. said, "which has less chance of recovery."
These words have rung in my head over and over for the last 8 days.
I began thinking of how this would affect the family dynamics. Ramps will need to be placed into the house, new van accessible for wheelchairs, a new table for them to sit at low enough for his chair to slide under, etc...
Through the initial shock and tears my husband and I shed while driving to Louisiana to be there to support our dear friends, one thing kept ringing in my ears louder than anything...
"God is in control. Before the foundations of this earth was formed, God ordained for Pastor Rob, on July 3, 2012, to dive into the pool and break his neck. All things happen for the good of God's children whom He loves.
"And we know that all
things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the
called according to his purpose." ~ Romans 8:28
God knew Amy would be at
Walmart, the kids would witness their daddy not coming up for air. Their
oldest few would pull him up, Cade, the oldest at age 12, would blow breaths
of life into his blue daddy saving Rob with the help of God our Father
in heaven.
It has been a long week for my friends. Sleepless nights, sinus issues, hard decisions to be made, not so nice nurses, broken dishwasher, need for constant oxygen, a/c stopped working, did I mention sleepless nights?
Many would look at this family and think of the shattered dreams.
Bike rides would end, camping would be harder, water parks
would be no longer be a time of daddy walking up the steps to enjoy the
excitement as they raced down water slides, adventuring through the woods behind their house...no more. Running through the water at the beach...no more. Hiking through the mountains...no more...
But I would say to those who consider their life full of shattered dreams...consider this...
Their life as it is now, has just begun.
Some physical dreams may be shattered but this is the beginning of Spiritual dreams they would never have imagined.
To grow in the Lord, spiritually, in news ways.
Learning to lean and depend on Christ deeper than they have ever had to.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." ~Proverbs 3:5-6
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." ~Proverbs 3:5-6
Growing their faith, trusting in their great God and believing His Word.
Being humbled by the love and support of people from all over praying for them.
The strength our great God has given them in this time of weakness. Physically and spiritually.
" Fear
thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will
strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with
the right hand of my righteousness." ~Isaiah 41:10
The opportunities that continue to arise for them to share of God's goodness. People they would have never met...nurses, drs, therapists...
New ways each day to seek our Lord for their needs.
"Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always."~1 Chronicles 16:11
Grow in patience.
" My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience." ~James 1:2-3
Friends, it is ok to be sad, it is ok to hurt knowing the difficulty this trial has brought... this was a horrible accident, that will be filled with many trials, tears, hard times, disappointments and they will need our constant prayers,encouragement and help, but in the end, we are to have faith in God's Word that He will be glorified in Rob's accident.We are to be encouraged to look and see how the Lord will use this trial in the lives of this family (and ours) to draw them and others closer to Christ.
Yes, again, they will have some shattered dreams physically, but I know this family...growing spiritually is the most important thing to them. And as hard as it may be for them, I know, without a doubt, they will suffer through this time trusting in God's Word that this is for their best.
If you would like to keep up with the progress of Pastor Rob and "meet" his family, check out their blog.
If the Lord places it on your heart to help them financially, go here.
Update on Pastor Rob...He felt a tiny
sensation in his foot the other day. We rejoice!!! The doctor has said
he is now considered "incomplete paralysis". The story is not over... God may desire to show His great power and restoration. It will be a hard time of
therapy, but we are praying for Rob to be able to use his hands again,
to stroke the tender heads of his children, hold his wife in his arms,
and walk....if it be the Lord's will.
Brother Rob and Amy..." we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord
and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work,
growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power
according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and
patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified
you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light" (Col.1:10-12). We LOVE you, our brother and sister in Christ!!! Know that even though we are not close, you are near to our heart.
To God be the Glory...to God be the Glory....
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