Have you ever gone through a time when you felt like things were not going smoothly in your life?
It might be a troubled marriage, a troubled child, a friend close who has hurt you, loved one diagnosed with something, single and wanting to meet that "special" one. It might me a failed adoption, or that sin in you that just won't go away. In-laws who treat you like dirt, financial troubles, or building a house and all the chaos that goes with it.
Whatever the situation, you are overwhelmed. Sleepless nights, tension headaches, worry, anxiety.
I have had moments like these.
Times when a situation has occurred and my mind starts wander.
I start thinking of the "what if's", my appetite changes, sleepless nights, tears rolling down the face, snapping at those around me, angry, a loss of desire to do much.
These are hard times. Times I have struggled through.
When a trial enters into my life, it usually starts out like this...
"I do not like this. Ouch, this hurts...but I will trust in you God for in your Word it says,
'And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son..." (Romans 8:28-29)
He comforts me, but I still hurt.
I start thinking of my situation again. The anger starts to creep in.
I grab my Bible and open up to the Psalms. Chapter 88 in this case...
"O LORD God of my salvation, I have cried day and night before thee: Let my prayer come before thee: incline thine ear unto my cry; For my soul is full of troubles: and my life draweth nigh unto the grave. I am counted with them that go down into the pit: I am as a man that hath no strength..."My mind is at war. I start quoting scripture. Anything I know...even if it does not pertain. I sing praises to our Heavenly Father.
But I always come back to how I do not like my trial. I begin to dwell on it.
In these times, what am I looking at?
My trial or God?
I want to say God, but if I am truly looking at Him, would I be having sleepless nights, loss of appetite, and so on? Am I trusting in my Heavenly Father who has ordained all things for my good?
I am reminded (thanks My Man!) of the true account of one of the miracles by Jesus in Matt. 14:22-33:
"Immediately Jesus made His disciples get into the boat and go before Him to the other side, while He sent the multitudes away. And when He had sent the multitudes away, He went up on the mountain by Himself to pray. Now when evening came, He was alone there. But the boat was now in the middle of the sea, tossed by the waves, for the wind was contrary. Now in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went to them, walking on the sea. And when the disciples saw Him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, "It is a ghost!" And they cried out for fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, "Be of good cheer! It is I; do not be afraid." And Peter answered Him and said, "Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water." So He said, "Come." And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, "Lord, save me!" And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?" And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased. Then those who were in the boat came and worshiped Him, saying, 'Truly You are the Son of God.'"
The Lord has graciously convicted me over the past 2 years of my lack of faith in Him. I am ashamed to admit this, but I must be honest and confess.
He has showed me I am to truly put all hope and trust in Him.
I always thought I did, but due to answered prayers, God showed me my weakness and sin.
I can honestly say that my faith has grown because of the gifts of trials.
Men will let you down
(Psa 146:3 Put not your trust in princes, nor in the son of man, in whom there is no help. ), but my God will always be faithful!!!
Yes, I knew it in my mind, but in my heart...I obviously doubted.
I thank God for my trials, for they truly are a gift from Him to grow me in Him and less of myself.
A Gift. I would not have said this 2 years ago.
I now can honestly say, God as my witness, I embrace my trials.
Do they hurt? YES!!!
Do I stumble? YES!!!
BUT...
I serve a GREAT God whom loves me so much that He convicts me of my sin, and continues to conform me into His image. Even if it will hurt.
How about you? Are you going through something? Have you been through something recently?
What have YOU been looking at? Dig deep, cry out to God, and ask Him to show you...
Do you, like Peter, see that the wind is boisterous, are you afraid, or are you keeping your eyes fixed upon Christ, the author and finisher of our faith.
Psalms 63:8 "My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me."